The Crazy Solution: Or, a new modest proposal


I was driving to work recently on an unusually warm day for late fall. I turned on the air conditioner and the radio. The news was on as I pulled into a station to fill up. Gas prices are still rising, I was thinking about where all that oil money goes and it really makes me sick. Just then, it hit me like a bean burrito and a bad jalapeno. It’s gas and inflation. Our problems about energy, gas rising, and inflation are all the same.

         According to opinion polls, the top problems and issues that we Americans are most concerned about in this election cycle are: The Economy, The War, Climate Change, and Health care.

         Our economy is tied to energy mainly because of the price of oil, which is at an all time high. The War on Terror is related to energy because the place where most of our oil comes from is also the source of the terrorists and their funding. We are sponsoring terrorism by buying oil from the Middle East at high prices. That causes gas to go goes up and inflation.

         Climate change is related because we burn energy that causes CO2 gas to rise, which causes a greenhouse effect that at least partially causes global warming, which inflates the atmosphere with excess heat.

         Healthcare costs are rising out of control as well. A lot of our health problems are also related to energy, an energy surplus problem.  We are fat. We eat too much. The majority of Americans are overweight. This causes health problems like heart disease, cancer, diabetes, high blood pressure, and so on. Food digestion also contributes to global warming by releasing large quantities of methane. Methane gas is even worse than CO2 for its greenhouse effects. The largest source of methane is from factory farms that produce meat from cows and pigs. We eat them and guess what. More gas rises, and inflation occurs.

  

How do we stop this? That is the trillion-dollar question.

 

OK, here is my far out crazy solution.

 

         What if we could use our extra fat energy to power our cars and trucks instead of burning gasoline and diesel? We already have the technology to run engines off of other biofuels like Alcohol, Vegetable oils, Animal byproducts and even Natural Gas (Methane). Could it be possible to use some of the excess fat energy we are carrying around. Then we could eat all we want, yet be trim and healthy, Drive all we want without buying gas or oil from the Middle East, and help stop global warming!!!!!!!! Wouldn't that be cool!!!!!!!!!!!!

         I know its not that simple and it may or may not work but what if it did? Americans are pretty creative, surely we can figure out energy solutions to stop terrorism, healthcare costs, gas, and inflation from rising out of control any longer.